012: Nature Calls
Animal facts, an ode to a cult 1997 film and two nature escapes in the UK.
On our last few days of travel, I forced Harry to get introspective with me by asking some questions about our time away. Amongst the questions about peaks and pits, things we’d do again and others we wouldn’t, we spoke about our biggest learnings. Mine? Nature is crazy.
London is a dead zone for nature. Yes, there are a few large parks, the occasional re-wilding zone and some wetlands, but other than that it’s pavements, busy roads and coffee shops. I can’t remember the last time I saw a bird that wasn’t a pigeon or a parakeet.
When we travelled through Ecuador we were lucky enough to experience two places so diametrically opposed to London that it’s hard to believe they share the same atmosphere. First we took an overnight bus to the Amazon (where the driver insisted on repeatedly singing Mambo No. 5 throughout the night) before we hopped on a flight over to the Galapagos.
I’d always wanted to visit the Amazon ever since watching the 1997 cult film Anaconda starring JLo, Ice Cube, Owen Wilson and Jon Voight. Yes, really. The terrible CGI snake convinced me that it would be fun to be surrounded by nature so wild that it could kill me.
While the Galapagos was a destination we’d toyed with leaving off the itinerary due to the sheer cost of travelling there (more on that in another Substack, I’m sure) it became apparent that we’d be making a mistake after chatted to a few people who couldn’t stop banging on about how amazing the islands were. We were essentially peer pressured into going.
Before these trips, I hadn’t realised that my life sans insects, birds and sea animals was actually a little bit sad. Beyond my dog whose every little movement is a miracle to me I had forgotten that the natural world is frankly insane in a way that will make you whisper “what the f” out-loud several times a day.
What made our experiences a thousand times better were our guides. I’ve never encountered people who have such clear and joyful job satisfaction. I guess that’s what a job outside can do for you! Not only did they have keen eyes and an encyclopaedic knowledge of all creatures great and small, they seemed to have a genuine unbridled enthusiasm for seeing even the most basic of animals.
So without further ado, here are the best and weirdest things we saw and learned in the Amazon and the Galapagos:
Pink river dolphins – which are a thing BTW – have evolved to be able to turn their heads 180 degrees so that they can hunt for food in the mangroves.
FYI, tarantulas live in burrows, not webs.
The humble ant became one of my favourite sightings. Luis told us that the army ants will typically walk miles to find the only the very best and greenest leaves to bring back to their colony and most importantly, their queen. Ladies, this is a sign that if he wanted to, he would.
If you’re a fan of The Last Of Us (let’s talk about Pedro, please) then you’ll know that mushrooms are the biggest threat to human existence ever (ignoring the current global political turmoil we’re currently experiencing). Our eagle-eyed guide Luis spotted a cordyceps mushroom using an insect as a host and honestly, I found that more freaky than anything else we saw.
After swimming in Laguna Grande and scrambling back into our boat to motor back to our lodge, I spotted a snake swimming on the surface of the water – turns out that that snake is pretty deadly. Maybe I should have listened to Jon Voight saying “this river can kill you in a thousand ways.”
Expecting to see jaguars, tapirs and piranhas? You’ll probably see more stinky turkeys than anything else.
And FYI, piranhas aren’t actually human flesh eating fish. They’ve been the victim of bad PR – they’re actually pretty chill.
There is natural mosquito repellent everywhere – after accidentally wearing shorts instead of longs for our jungle walk, our guide had us smoking parts of tree bark that are thought to keep the mozzies away. Sorry mum, I swear it was an essential survival tactic.
There are even pigeons in the Amazon. They get everywhere.
And one of my favourite moments from the Amazon was hearing Luis’ surprise at spotting a monkey with extra large…well…you listen for yourself:
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When we happened upon a large pod of dolphins while out on a trip in the Galapagos, I noticed that one of the dolphins was loudly thwacking their tail on the surface of the water. Our guide told us that this is actually a navigation and communication tactic. Based on the pods in-sync movements, that method seemed to be more successful than what I do when Harry drives.
Sea lions like to hang. These guys are all over the Galapagos Islands and while we’d try our best to stay out of their way to give them space, we’d often find them gravitating towards us. Sat on the beach? They’ll plop themselves down by your feet. Having a nice little swim in the sea? It’s play time, baby!
We completely lucked out one morning when we took a bike ride to El Estero on Isabela island and discovered that not only were we completely alone, but we’d arrived just in time to be witness to a large hatch of blue-footed boobies hunting together. A loud screech would be the signal before the group dove into the sea together – hundreds of birds acting in unison time and time again. It was pretty magical to see.
Plus, in the same spot penguins, sea lions and pelicans were all hanging out together like it was a Galapagos version of Watership Down.
And our very best sighting was a complete surprise – despite knowing that there are some resident orcas in the Galapagos, I had accepted that the chances of seeing them were slim to nothing. Lo and behold, a group of 6 or 7 whales (with a baby!) popped up out of nowhere on the pursuit of a 3-course sea turtle dinner (RIP) while we were on the 360 tour around San Cristobal island and my god, it was a moment I’ll never forget.
And despite going to Sea World several times as a child, I still did not know that orcas are actually dolphins, not whales. You truly learn something everyday.
I love a good mystery so finding out that they’re still not quite sure how giant tortoises got to the Galapagos was a delight. The main school of thought is that they boarded some floating vegetation and made their way over as if they were on a cruise. I adore the visual of a group of confused tortoises happening upon paradise.
And finally, giant tortoises will not give a s*** if you have a dramatic adult fall into their pond.
During our time in the Amazon and Galapagos we got muddy, wet and salty. I scrambled across rocks, ducked under spider webs and wore wellies (that I had to check every morning for nefarious creepy crawlies). I swam, hiked, climbed and snorkelled. I fell over. Three times in one day! The scratches on my arm are still healing.
Just like I had as a child, I had my mind blown time and time again. Everyday felt like a school day with our guides – I learned new things, was reminded of old knowledge that had been buried at the back of my mind since year 8 biology and saw the rhythms of nature play out in front of me.
My “WTF” count was sky high throughout those 2 and a half weeks. Unfortunately I doubt I’ll be hanging out with sea lions or chancing upon sloths in London, but I’ll be keeping my eye out for anything wilder than the humble pigeon. Just in case.
Closer to home, here are my two favourite nature escapes that we’ve been lucky enough to visit in the UK:
Elmley Nature Reserve is 3,300 acre re-wilding project on the Isle of Sheppey in Kent. A lover of experience-based presents over physical gifts (although I’ll take both, thanks), Harry booked us a stay in this cute lil shepherd’s hut as a Christmas gift way back in 2023.
The highlight of our weekend away was a dusk birdwatching walk – not my usual vibe, but a must-do while you’re there thanks to (once again) the guides enthusiasm for all things avian. I wouldn’t have previously put Harry down as a future twitcher but I struggled to prise the binoculars out of his hands. I can’t say that I’m looking forward to that era…
If I was to go again, I’d love to grab 10 mates and rent out the fancy farmhouse. When we went, the farmhouse was split into individual rooms with some communal areas so we were able to explore the building – the kitchen has a great view over the grounds and would be a lovely place for a cup of tea (or milk for me) in the morning with your PJs on.
As much as I would love to gate-keep Cove Valley, it’s for the greater good that the people know.
From the folksy Americana interiors by HÁM Interiors, to the wood-fired outdoor bath and the beautiful uninterrupted views, Cove Valley ticks so many boxes that our weekend there is one of my favourite staycations ever. Plus, the isolation meant that I was forced to just sit, read and thrash Harry at Monopoly Deal. Always a delight.
Cove Valley’s re-wilding project is actively dedicated to reintroducing wildlife to its 300 acres. One early evening we took a walk around the property (where we accidentally ended up in someone’s garden - soz!) to try to spot beavers, iron age pigs, white storks and red deer. Plus, if you visit during rutting season like we did, you’ll be treated to the sultry sounds of deer trying to make babies in the evenings.
Our weekend away was spent snoozing in the lovely Hopi cabin which I’d insisted on booking because the little kitchenette was the perfect shade of blue. I’d recommend booking this cabin because you can drive up to it (some of the other rooms require a bit of a walk down into the forest – we’re lazy) and it has unmatched sunset views across the hills.
And on a slight tangent but still sort of staying on theme, yesterday I watched this relaxing Arch Digest video about how architect Jim Cutler integrated water into the design of a house build project. Dream home material ✅
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